The Enneagram tests confirm that I am E1w2 SO Todays question on wings. The words that stand out for me are, consistently generous and more gregarious. These words pleased and made me feel happy. In my early years I was not very generous with lots of things especially my possessions or finances. I also found it very hard in lots of situation to be sociable as I was very shy and got tongue tied very easily. Over the last number of years as I matured I made a conscious effort to be generous with others and share what I have. Looking at my nine wing as I matured I can relax more, even when there are still things to finish or work to do. I make a conscious effort to tell myself “Tomorrow is another day” Or if I am very tired I don’t push myself like I used to did when I was younger. I am also much less reactive and more thoughtful of others opinions.
The Enneagram tests confirm that I am E1w2 SO
Todays question on wings. The words that stand out for me are, consistently generous and more gregarious. These words pleased and made me feel happy. In my early years I was not very generous with lots of things especially my possessions or finances. I also found it very hard in lots of situation to be sociable as I was very shy and got tongue tied very easily.
Over the last number of years as I matured I made a conscious effort to be generous with others and share what I have.
Looking at my nine wing as I matured I can relax more, even when there are still things to finish or work to do. I make a conscious effort to tell myself “Tomorrow is another day” Or if I am very tired I don’t push myself like I used to did when I was younger. I am also much less reactive and more thoughtful of others opinions.
Great insights. I love how your nine wing has given you the gift of lower reactivity. That is a blessing! I strive for that daily!
Is there any other one in the group? it would be of great great help and value for me to be able to discuss some of the enneagram material with another One!!!
This weeks question has been very helpful in helping me see how the three Subtypes show up in my life. I have found Dr. Tom LaHue’s videos on the wings and the subtypes very insightful. I recognise my dominant subtype SO as suggested by the Enneagram test and discussed on the video to be very me. I am a retired nurse lecturer and teacher. So lecturing and modelling come very naturally too me. I have been told on many occasions that my talking style is lecturing (by my husband, which drives him mad) I could not see this. As far as I was concerned I was just discussing the issues involved.
I also model living a good lifestyle, healthy eating, exercising, meditation and generally taking care of myself and find it hard to accept and believe others can’t do the same. This is very much in line with a One SO. While Dr. Tom LaHue discussed the One SO I was cringing thinking about what he was saying.
I also recognise how the Subtype SP shows up for me. Looking back over my life I was very hard on myself as a young person and in the later 20 years thanks to the information sent in the daily thought for the day, from the Enneagram institute. One message in particular “stop treating yourself like a self improvement project”. I thought yes that’s me.
The One on One subtype I would feel is the hardest for me to access. I feel very comfortable talking and interacting with an another person on a one to one basis. I recognise that I do have a lot of suppressed anger which can show up as resentment. However I don’t know how to express this anger in a healthy. If accessing the SX Subtype can help me express my anger in a healthy way that would be great? I am not sure if this is on the right tract or not? Looking forward to the next weeks question and material.
Great comments! I love your insights. I’m determined to get our other ones on the forum!
Looking at my courageous question this week, I feel I am much more aware of how I unconsciously react and think about my Tragic Gap. What I realise is that I have no control over this issue. Going around all three centres of intelligence I realise I can’t fix someone else its their job. As a One I can be like a police woman which must drive others crazy. But I do see the compassion and love I have for others. I realize I need more compassion for myself. I need to back off and hold the tension with this tragic gap and allow a third way to develop. I must show patience and trust others more. Coming back to my gut, I know I am a good person not perfect but I don’t need to be. Being more relaxed, taking time out for myself and giving myself and others a break is the best thing to do. I need to laugh more and play more and know this is alright. I am loved for me. God loves me the way I am. I am very grateful.
I like this process it is very useful.
What terrific insights! Thank you so much for sharing!!
Marie, I just want to thank you for sharing your experiences as a One. I read them all just now and can see my One wing showing up in your reflections. My wing is very strong (so much that I’ve often wondered if I’ve mistyped myself). I vascillate between the Nine (everyone is wonderful as they are) and the One (but if only you’d change, you’d be better). I dislike this judgmental part of myself and try to keep it hidden, but under stress it rears its head. I will continue to check in here during the class. Just wanted you to know I am reading and appreciative!
Hello Jennifer, its lovely to have another voice on this page. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
Reflecting on harmony in my life. For me harmony means that my body, my heart and my mind are all in balance. That I take care of my body, by eating well, get exercise each day by walking in my local park. I take care of my heart by caring for and working hard to maintain the relationships that are important, my family and friends. Peace of mind comes by meditating each morning and reading the meditations sent each day by the Centre of Action and Contemplation. Learning more about myself though the Enneagram work has also been very beneficial in helping me cope with life now at this time. I am seeing myself the way I am and I am making different choices that are better for me and also for the people around me.
What is in balance or harmony in my life at this time are my relationships. The Enneagram work has given me huge insight into myself and I can see growth which I know is helping my relationships.
What is out of harmony or balance for me at the moment is……. I have very little space for myself. Space in my head to think or space in the day to do things for myself.
Taking what is in harmony and what is not in harmony around the three centres of intelligence has lead to me asking spiritual questions.
How can space for me find me at this time?
How can my choices lead me to have more space for me while still caring for my family?
How can peace find me at this time?
This is wonderful, Marie! I’m going to adopt your question “How can peace find me at this time?”
Week one daily question. What have I learned? How might my personality’s innate vital force be balanced with the other two essential forces when holding my “Tragic Gap”
My Tragic Gap “no space for me in my daily life” As a type One I am always doing. By moving to my heart space, I go to Type 4 (which is receptive energy) by going inward to learn how I feel. This allows me to have empathy and understanding for myself and others. In the heart space if I can receive and integrate all I am grateful for. This will change my energy and allow me to be more open hearted towards myself, to have more empathy and understanding for myself.
Then when I move to the head space which for me is type 7 (active outward energy) I can ask the question “Is this good for me” Normally as a Type One, I go from Gut to Head which means I go straight into action with no feeling for myself. But by going to Heart space I get in touch with my feelings for me.
Last stage is back to Gut Type One (Balancing energy). I now have more choices that include my feeling. I don’t have to just react and do, trying to fix everything. I can ask myself “is this good for me”?
My instinctive Social Subtype works to focus on working towards shared purpose or the greater good for others or for the group. So in my situation it can hinder how I hold my “Tragic Gap” ……. as I unconsciously ask “what is the best/good for others/group”.
I need to ask where do I fit in? I need to start asking myself “is this good/best for me”
The essence of my Soul Child as a Type 7 can illuminate my Tragic Gap by suggesting options. I have options, choices that include what is good/best for me as well as for others. Co-creation type 7’s essence, so its not just up to me to fix things. I don’t need to take all the responsibility. Others also know what right and are responsible for themselves.
My Holy Idea is Holy Perfection… everything is perfect, good and positive. By accepting growth…. everything is growing, developing and evolving I can seeing everything as perfect.
For me growth is, open hearted acceptance of me. I am important, I have needs, I need fun and relaxation in my life to grow and develop. I can have time and space for me, its not being selfish.
By consulting all three centers of Intelligence my courageous question does shift.
I can make space for me in my daily life by making choices that are good for me. I am going to start asking myself “how do I feel about this” and “is this good for me”
What beautiful work, Marie. You have inspired me to write my profile out and share it.